Embarkation

Sunday 17^th November

Why am I back on a cruise only 24 days after the last one? Well, the deal was too good to refuse. The cruise was obviously not popular, or else people don’t want to cruise at this time of year, and the price came down to £500 for an inside cabin and £600 for a balcony cabin. Furthermore, there was no single supplement! I haven’t seen a deal like this since last December. I had to snap it up. I contacted all of my UK cruising friends to see who could come but the only one available at such short notice (2 weeks) was Vi.

Getting to the cruise ship on a Sunday was a bit of an adventure. It required a lot of planning. Fortunately I had decided not to drive myself. It turned out that the A34 (the direct route between my village and Southampton) was closed for the weekend for resurfacing. Furthermore, a large load would be proceeding along the M4 at 10mph, pulled by two tractors and pushed by one. The diversion was due to take cars 70 miles out of the direct route!

The train should have been straightforward: walk five minutes to my local station, catch a train to Oxford and then a one-hour trip to Southampton. However, being a Sunday there was scheduled maintenance on the tracks, which meant train to Reading, coach to Basingstoke, train to Southampton. I could not face carrying a heavy suitcase through all those changes. I found one train at 10:15 that took me the scenic route (two and a half hours, not stopping but passing through Havant, Fareham and Hamble) from Oxford to Southampton. It was worth getting up early and catching the Radley train at 9:30 in order to catch this.

I met two other cruisers at the station and we shared a taxi to the ship. We passed through check-in immediately but had the usual 30-minute delay going through security, as many people don’t think to take off belts or shoes when they see others being instructed to do so.

It was great to be back on board and to be welcomed joyfully (sometimes with a hug) by staff members who know me from previous cruises.

Shall we dance?

Monday 18^th November

As usual on Queen Victoria, there are four Gentleman Dance Hosts. I knew I would miss dancing with Martin after the last cruise, and the fun of chatting to Jeff and Gary, so I had mentally prepared myself. Of course, that still doesn’t stop disappointment when reality hits.

Two of the Hosts are from the UK and two are from the USA. They all seem very nice. They are competent (though not exciting) dancers. Only one of them actually has an upright dancing frame, so I’m back to my social slouch. Of course, they all have their own style. I think I encountered three different rhythms for the foxtrot on the first night. It would help me if their leading was a bit stronger, as I have to work hard to follow. I will adjust in time.

On the first night a Japanese passenger came up to ask me to dance. He was actually the best dancer of my night. It would have helped if he’d been taller than I am. It would also have helped if he’d led me with his hand on my back instead of it resting lightly on my side. I don’t know if that was connected with the height differences (therefore length of arm) or if it is part of Japanese politeness and respect. On the second night many others from his group joined him in the ballroom, so I did not get to dance with him until later, after they had left.

On the second night a second passenger (American) also asked me for a lot of dances, some of them vigorous Swings. Add in a Cha cha with a third passenger and I was extremely busy!

On previous cruises I have always stayed until close to midnight, when the band stops. I’ve needed that time between 11 and midnight when there are very few single women. It’s the time I get lots of dances. At other times I might sit for 45 minutes without a dance. This time I’m dancing so much that I’m exhausted by 11pm and have to go for an early night. I’m not used to three fast dances in a row.

Gradually we are expanding our group of people with whom to sit. We try to gather all the single ladies together so that they are not sitting by themselves.

This is Vi dancing with Rob, an American Dance Host. 

This is me, dancing with Robert, another American Dance Host.

Here are the four Gentleman Dance Hosts.

One of the passengers danced with me a few times each evening. Towards the end of the cruise he gave me a nicely wrapped bar of Lindt chocolate as a thank you for the dancing. What a lovely gesture. (This photo is after a dance lesson during the day.)

Most of the dancing is to a live band, but some of it is to recorded music. The singer, Claudine Carle, performs for a few segments each night. She is a lovely warm person and often sits with us when she is not singing. She is a lovely dancer of the Argentine Tango and is trying to learn all the other dances as well.

Plumbing work

Tuesday 19^th November

 I half woke up in the middle of the night (well, 8am) to go to the toilet. I woke up completely when I stepped into the bathroom and found it sloshing with water.

The problem had started on Day 1 with my first shower. By the end of it I found myself 2-3 cms deep in water. It took about five minutes for the water to disappear. By the next morning I discovered that my toilet was full of water. It seemed to be slowly dripping from the cistern into the pan. I reported both of these faults to my room steward. He no doubt reported them to his supervisor, who informed maintenance (or did it also go through Head of Housekeeping first?) who appointed a workman. Luckily I returned to my room just as he’d supposedly fixed the toilet and was able to tell him about the shower – which hadn’t made it through to his job sheet. All fixed? It appeared so until this morning! I suspect the workman had only checked the outlet pipe, not the inlet one. During the night the toilet must have filled up again and the movement of the ship sent the water sloshing into my bathroom. At least it was clean water!

Housekeeping turned up quickly with an industrial vacuum to suck up the water, and disinfectant for the floor, while a maintenance man removed the panel on the corridor side and worked on pipes and valves. It was a relief to wash my feet (and then go back to bed for another couple of hours of sleep).

Lisbon

Wednesday 20^th November

Today we visited Lisbon. There was no shuttle bus to the city centre. That was a change from my previous trips. There were also no instructions on how to get to an interesting area. I set off walking ever upward through tiny alleyways until I gave up and decided to ride the number 28 tram instead. I rode it to the terminus then had to get off for five minutes, buy another ticket and get back on to go back towards the port! After half an hour I could see the ship down through an alley and asked the driver if I should get off there. He gestured in a half rectangle, which made me think he would come back to the port. I asked that and he did not deny it. However, 15 minutes later we reached the other terminus where he changed places with a woman driver. When I asked her what was happening the surly driver revealed that he could speak English and said ‘I never told you we were going to the port’! They suggested I walk for 10 minutes to catch a bus (which I later found would have taken me right opposite the port, as long as I’d found its bus stop and taken it in the right direction). I checked by asking a bus driver and he said I should take the number 15 tram. (Back at the port later, there were no tram tracks on that road so I don’t know where I would have ended up if I had followed that advice.) A woman at a bus stop kept telling me ‘Metro’. However, an American tourist walked me to the nearest corner and told me to walk to the end of the street and turn left and I’d see the ship. Simples!

Food, glorious food!

Thursday 21^st November

It is impossible to go hungry on this ship. The buffet restaurant is open 24 hours a day, as is rom service. Other bars and the Main Dining Room are only open at specific times. There are three different areas in the Lido Buffet, and in less busy times they close off one or two of them and just keep one open. Each section has to be closed off at times for cleaning and to restock with a different type of food, as breakfast segues into lunch, then afternoon snack, then dinner, then late snack (11pm to 4am). Each area of the buffet has its own drinks station with hot and cold drinks, for serve-your-own drinks.

The dining rooms are more formal. Breakfast ends at 9:30, so you can guess that I rarely make it, even though I think the restaurant here has the best scrambled eggs at sea. This involves full waiter service. The midday meal is a formal affair also, with a three-course menu if you wish. The evening meal is the most formal. When I booked, I had to choose early sitting (6pm) or late sitting (8:30 pm). I chose to be at early sitting at a table for 8. (I could have asked for 2, 4, 6, 8 or10 at a table.) I am at that table, with the same people, for the whole cruise unless I have a problem with them and ask to be moved. We have the same two waiters for the whole cruise. Again, it is a 3-course meal with an optional salad to make a fourth course. If I am extra hungry I could select two entrees. If I can’t choose between all the desserts, I can have two of those. Sometimes I’ll ask for my dessert with a scoop of vanilla ice cream, even though that is not on the menu. The staff go out of their way to help. When beef empanadas are down as a starter, I generally ask to have three of them as a main course instead!

I do get tired of sitting through all the formality night after night, and generally go to the Lido Buffet (‘the trough’) a few times each cruise. This time, I will probably eat at the Lido most of the time, as Vi does not like eating at 6pm and prefers a light meal at 7pm instead. Also, I was not impressed two days ago when the lady next to me coughed in the direction of my dinner, without adequately covering her mouth. Later, when my arm was on the table, I noticed it got a bit damp as this woman spoke. It did make me wonder what else had gone into my dinner earlier that night, especially as her partner was coming down with a cold!

 If the weather is suitable, it is also possible to take food out into the Winter Garden. This area is a lovely sun trap on cooler sunny days, while the roof opens up on hot days. It is best avoided in Winter!

Agadir

Friday 22^nd November

Today I went out with Vi and Tricia and we were taken for a ride - literally but not metaphorically. It started with a taxi ride to the local shops, supposedly, for 2 euros. Three hours later we still had not reached those shops. First of all we were taken to an artisan centre with expensive goods, including Tricia (who we had met in the ballroom)! The salesman was so besotted with her that I asked him how many camels he would offer for her. Tricia says he offered 50,000 but I think it was 5,000. Nobody offered camels for Vi or me.

 Back in the taxi, I could see the souk I wanted to visit and kept on and on telling him 'Gate 8, 9, and 10.' He said there was no such thing. He said the goods were old. We insisted and he dropped us at gate 1, fruit and veggies. We looked in a spice shop where I am sure the shopkeeper offered me Viagra (herbal equivalent?). Vi bought a hard piece of sandalwood. We walked further and looked at slippers and clothes and Vi bought a kaftan. We were shown the plant from which twigs are pulled off to use as toothpicks. The shopkeeper demonstrated on his teeth and then put the twig back in the plant and put it on display. Vi was interested in the lipstick substitute until she realised that the shopkeeper was spitting on his finger and then rubbing it on the hard substance before demonstrating the colour on his hand. Hygiene was not a basic consideration!

Back in the taxi, we thought we were at last going to the local shops. Several kms later and a few back streets and potholes, we ended up at a medina on waste ground where we were expected to pay an entrance fee. By this time we had had enough. Vi had been a bit worried on the lonely tracks. I got stern. ‘Take us back to the shuttle bus!’ He was obviously annoyed. He put the radio on loudly. I asked him to turn it down.

At the shuttle bus, he wanted us to pay him 20 euros in addition to the 3 euros we had already given him. No way! I stood my ground and told him he had taken us to places we had not asked for. We had asked for prices along the way and he would not tell us. He had insisted on waiting for us; it wasn’t our choice. We handed over 10 euros and he argued at first but then he legged it when an official came over. He knew he was in the wrong. (I had got prices from the internet so I knew what was standard for the places we visited.) Hopefully he will have more respect for women tourists in future.

Despite the concern about the taxi driver, we had a good time together and laughed for practically the whole 3 hours.

Ship maintenance

Saturday 23^rd November

The sea air is hard on ships, and constant maintenance is needed. For financial reasons the ship cannot go into dry dock for minor work like painting, so this takes place on a continual basis around the ship. Sometimes it goes unnoticed for a whole voyage; sometimes it becomes only too evident. This morning I was awoken by hammering! I hve no idea what was being done as I rolled over and tried to get back to sleep. I managed well, but  kept being woken by the next bout of hammering.

On my last cruise the balconies were being repainted. This had involved noisy work as the old paint was chipped off before the new paint could be applied. Actually, on this cruise I can still see evidence of that work in the form of dots of white paint on the blue balcony chairs! There are often notices up around the ship, warning of wet paint or oiled surfaces.

Cleaning the ship is also a continuous job. I have a steward who is responsible for my room (and others along the corridor). He comes in each morning to make up my bed, clean and straighten the bathroom and main room, change towels, fill the ice bucket, etc. He also comes in at night to clean the bathroom again, turn down the bed covers and put out chocolates and the news sheet. Cleaning the corridor outside of my room is also his responsibility, as is cleaning and straightening my balcony.

As you walk around the ship, you see housekeeping staff wiping skirting boards with a dust mop, dusting walls, polishing lift doors, wiping balcony rails with disinfectant and so forth. Up on deck there are stewards to take care of dirty or wet towels after passengers have sunbathed or swum. They put the sunloungers into position each morning and put them away at night.

I have not seen this at work but I assume it is for cleaning the windows.

There are lots of unnoticed members of staff keeping the ship in good order for our enjoyment.

Cadiz

Sunday 24^th November

I have been to Cadiz before, back in the days when I used to plan a bit more thoroughly. I had maps with all the points of interest marked. I did not see them all last time so I set off this time ready to go to every one of the 19 marked spots. Like most action plans, it didn’t last past the first encounter!

The sun was shining, the sky was blue, the sea was sparkling. Why would I want to walk through shady alleys and look at monuments and buildings? I chose to walk around the bay instead. Cadiz is built on a spit of land, so it is possible to walk around the sea walls, and then at the Cathedral area to cut through a narrow ‘neck’ and get back to the port area, rather than walking further inland.

The temperature was forecast to be 14 degrees, so I had worn a black woollen jacket. Out in the sun I thought I was overdressed. However, as soon as I walked in the shade I knew that it was needed! How lovely to bask in the sun instead of experiencing England’s snow.

At port security (before getting back on the ship) something must have  shown up on the screening machines as I was stopped and asked if there was a nail file in my handbag. Yes, there was. It was confiscated! It will be given to ship’s security just before the ship sails. I will have to collect it from the purser’s desk, where a member of security will bring a form for me to sign! I suppose I should be glad they were so focused on the nail file that they didn’t notice my first aid kit with the scissors and pointy tweezers! I am obviously a great security risk! (It’s strange that Cadiz objected but every other port has cleared my handbag with no problems. That happened to a friend on our first cruise; one port objected to his pocket knife though every other port had let him through.)

Later, when Vi and I went out for coffee in order to use free wifi, she lost her access card. That meant a visit to ship’s security for identification and then a visit to the purser’s desk for a new card.

Gibraltar

Monday 25^th November

Last time I visited Gibraltar I caught the cable car to the top of The Rock and walked down with a group of people from the ship. This time I thought I would try out the tax-free shopping. Everyone else seems to find bargains in foreign ports, not to mention lovely dresses that are different from anything else you would find at home. I never have that luck. The clothes shops we found were either parts of a UK chain or were very cheap with poor-quality fabric. Moreover, shopping with friends meant that we went more slowly than I can cope with. I can walk; I can dance; I cannot stand still and I cannot amble. I have a problem whereby the blood does not pump around my body properly when I stand still; I need to keep moving to stop it pooling in my feet. Shopping is therefore a nightmare! I felt nauseous and had a headache. In the end I had to leave my friends and set off by myself, striding out, to get back to normal. 

I did manage a few purchases. I bought a Swarovski Christmas star and four new Spanish fans. In the evenings on a cruise I need to fan myself between dances in order to cool down. I think I will have to aim for a different fan for each evening outfit, not to mention small fans for each handbag in order to cope with Australia’s heat on holiday. This is obviously what every aspiring fashionista needs!

Life on board ship

Tuesday 26^th November

You might wonder what I find to do on the ship all day, especially on a cruise like my last one that had about 12 sea days. I thought I’d go through the daily programme for today and write a summary of all the events on offer at various times during the day. I’ll group them as themes rather than in their time slots. (Of course, some could go in two themes, but I’ll put them in just one.) The programme begins with a morning TV show at 6am, but the events themselves start at 7am and go for over 18 hours. (The last event starts at 1am and is billed as going ‘until late’.)

Fitness

            Morning stretch

            Fab abs

            Yoga

            Tour de cycle

            Body sculpt boot camp

            Pilates

Spa

            Skin care clinic

            Acupuncture pain management

            Secrets to a flatter stomach

            Magic make up party

            FDA approved wrinkle treatment

            Fluid retention and swollen ankles

            Healing with herbs

            Look 10 years younger today

            Leg therapy demonstration

Learning and information

            iStudy seminar: using your iPad

            iStudy next steps workshop: using iPhoto

            iStudy next steps: iMovie

            iStudy seminar: using your iPad; office tools

            Beginners’ bridge class

            Intermediate bridge class

            Duplicate bridge play

            Social whist play

            Watercolour art class

            Virtual bridge tour

            Photo seminar

            Captains’ corner

            Art talk: Sherree Valentine Daines

            Cunard insights: the story of Danielle Cable

            Meet the singers: interviewing the onboard singers

            Classical concert: saxophone and piano

            premium vodka tasting seminar

           

Dancing

            Line dance class

            Ballroom dance class

            Ballroom and latin dancing to prerecorded music

            Royal Ascot Ball

Entertainment and competitions

            Morning trivia

            Afternoon trivia

            Early evening wipeout trivia

            Bingo ticket sales

            Guest talent show sign up

            Skittles tournament

            Darts competition

            Quiz corner

            Paddle tennis competition

            Deck quoits competition

            golf putting tournament

            Shuffleboard competition

            Snowball jackpot bingo

            Activity corner: hat making (for Royal Ascot Ball)

            Host corner: needlework and knitting

            Showtime: Dance passion (put on twice)

Music and singing

            Queen Victoria vocalists (choir of interested passengers)

            Pianist in the Chart room

            Synergy (modern band) (3 sessions)

            Pianist Ferry P. Bedy (2 sessions)

            Pianist Gavin Burke (2 sessions)

            Cocktail pianist Clarolyn Maier

            Adagio string quartet (3 sessions)

            Harpist Lara Szabo (2 sessions)

            Abba revival night

            Karaoke night

            DJ Chris

Special groups

            Masonic gathering

            Cruise critic.co.uk get together

            Friends of Bill W (= recovering alcoholics)

            Book club meeting

            Friends of Dorothy (= gay meeting)

In addition to this there are special events that don’t make it into the daily programme. For example, because I am now a Platinum card holder (= more than 70 days on Cunard ships) I could have attended a free wine tasting event and could go to the Captain’s and Senior Officers’ cocktail party in the evening. (I went to both last time; I don’t need to go again.)

If you are still bored with all of this, you could sunbathe, swim or sit in a hot tub; you could play table tennis, golf chipping, shuffleboard or quoits; you could visit the spa (nails, hair, massage) or the gym; you could go to the casino; you could shop for expensive jewellery or for daily specials; you could sit in the pub or a bar; you could visit the library.

After reading all of this, you must think I waste my opportunities at sea!